Thursday, 3 May 2007

Time (Is Something I Lack)

Right now I'm mega busy. No, that's an understatement; I'm ultra-mega busy. Hell, even that's an understatement. Lets just settle at me being ultra-mega-dontastic busy. You get the picture - I'm worked off my arse, with barely any room to breath.

All this work has landed on my lap in one go, and I'm not sure that I can do everything justice. I'm spending half an hour on one thing, but just a couple of minutes on something else - meaning my work looks unequal, and randomly crap. As a perfectionist, that's just not good enough for me. Hell, perfect isn't good enough for me!

(I've now used 'hell' twice in one post - if I carry on using the word, any puritans reading may well take to the streets and burn banners of me in protest. If it happened to Richard Gere, it can happen to anybody!)

Fact of the matter is, I haven't got time to do much else but sleep and work, and it gets me all huffy and depressed. I was *supposed* to be re-watching Torchwood season one a few weeks ago, but had to postpone the arrangement after damn stupid coursework got in my way. For the love of God, give me some free time!!!

I haven't even seen my girlfriend since last Saturday. Originally we were supposed to be seeing one another tonight, but that got cancelled cos of my Film Awards (and she's unable to attend). Then we said "okay, we won't let that beat us - Friday it is!" Erm, not quite, cos I start work on Friday, and so can't see her. The same for Saturday.

Sunday she's out in St. Annes doing God knows what (probably not swimming in the sea - have you seen the state of that water?!) and that would have been a perfect opportunity for me, cos I have a free day! Can't be helped I suppose - but d'oh!

The day after that, on Bank Holiday Monday I'm working until 5 o'clock, and by the time I get home and have had a bath it'll be knocking on seven already - which would mean a) I could see her, but only get an hour or two with her - or b) not see her, and miss her even more. It's a hard choice. And it could be Tuesday next week before I get to see her again.

That's not right - I shouldn't have to sacrifice somebody I love for other work commitments. Family should always come first, right? That's the depressing thing about becoming an adult, cos as much as I'd like to say yes, I know the answers a lot more complicated than that. I want to give my family all the time in the world - but time's the one commodity I don't have.

Guess we'll have to see how things work out. I've been dating Katie for 17 months now, and I'll be damned if I let some poxy work commitments get in the way of our relationship.

Adios amigos - and wish me luck tonight!
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