For some reason, I slipper yesterday and despite my reported nobility, I did what I'd promised myself I wouldn't do. Without going into specifics, it was a stupid attention seeking stunt that in the long run has only backfired on me and left me further apart from the one person I call a friend. Pretty sad I know, which is the reason why I'm writing this, almost as if I'm turning over a new leaf. I know, I know, I've said it before - but I mean it this time.
I gotta be stronger in myself, and have a little respect for myself and the thoughts that I think. I'm so quick to ask others for advice about how to live my life, but you know what? I'm clever enough (and certainly independent of others) to make my own judgements. I have a problem, then it's time I start dealing with it myself, not bragging about it (sometimes I do just that, like I'm sporting a new haircut or something with the bad news in my life) to others - at work, or elsewhere.
If I'm going to be an adult then it's time the people around me have trust that they can tell me whatever they want, and I won't go shouting out about it to other people who they might not want knowing. This exact reason... it's how I let Clare down. Telling people things they had no right knowing. Well, I won't let it happen again.
So this is me, the new me, that you'll be seeing a lot more of around these parts. Much less the gossiper, and much more of a respected listener who people actually want to talk to, because they trust me.
It's the way forward - listen, don't tongue wag.