Thursday, 6 September 2012

Seriously, Jack?

I hadn’t planned on writing another blog entry today – but then I got home after posting the first, to news that made my mouth go CHUD! onto the floor.

So, I reading Facebook on the toilet (like you do) when I stumble upon a piece of news about my friend Jack Porter. It lists his current location as Bogor, Jawa Tengah. I’ve never heard of the place; it sounds exotic, so I look it up.
Hmm, I think – what’s Jack doing there?
I start reading his wall/timeline (whatever Facebook calls it these days) and there’s comments from other friends, and his family, wishing him all the best on his travels.
His what now?
I like to think me and Jack are pretty close – he even stayed with me for a month last year whilst he went working the London Film Festival. So, if he’s away, especially somewhere as far gone as Indonesia, he’d have told me right?
I dig further – he went almost a month ago. Woah!
His comments to others suggest that he might be gone a while – maybe even a year. Suddenly a feeling comes over me – and I can’t quite put my finger on it.
I think it’s a mix of anger, and jealously, and complete shock.
Last time I ‘spoke’ to Jack (well, he text me) he asked me to go onto Skype. He’d been pleading with me for a while to do just that, because he was busy, and life was complicated, and he wanted to talk to me about something. I promised him I would… but never did.
Now I think I know what he wanted to tell me!
Thing is, even if I didn’t join up with him on Skype, why didn’t he text me or Facebook me to say he was going away – especially when I’d been planning on spending time with him during my recent stay in Manchester? Argh! Sometimes, Jack, you really frustrate me!!
What’s more frustrating is knowing I shouldn’t feel like that. God knows why he’s out there, but he’s clearly having an adventure, and it being Indonesia he might even be there to help others (a la Luka Kovac!). I dunno.
That’s why I’m angry – my friend didn’t tell me about this massive chapter in his life!!
Why am I jealous? I don’t think it’ll come as a massive surprise to anybody reading that I want an adventure. I’m 23 and missed out on gap year fun, and adventures, and on top of that my last holiday abroad (I don’t count Ireland…) was in 2008. To a HOLIDAY RESORT in Portugal.
I want to enjoy the world. Hell, if Jack had told me I’d have probably have gone with him!
Now he’s going to come back, have all these stories, and meanwhile boring old me has just been stuck in an office in Westfield, being a silly fart, doing unimportant stuff.
Still, considering it all, good for him – I suppose.
It’s a motivation for me to just go out, make lots of films, and be amazing. That way when he returns, he won’t be the only one who’s lived.
See you soon mate. Let’s hope we’re both happy.
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