Tuesday, 3 December 2013

12 Words

"This conversation should have happened in person. Regardless, I agree its over."

Hang about, I hear you cry... what conversation? What's over?!

This:

ME & TOHKO

Well, she did it again.

Yep, Tohko has dumped me.

I suspected it was coming, after the 2nd break-up-and-then-get-back-together. For that reason, emotionally I don't think it's affected me as much as you'd think.

What were her reasons?

She doesn't think I'm right for her.

What was her justification?

It started when I said in email, almost-but-not-quite in passing that she's spending too long at university, working too many hours on projects, and needs to make sure she has a life outside of its four walls. Having been there/done that myself with both uni and the cinema, I was looking out for her - genuinely - with her interests first.

She thinks I'm frustrated because I don't get to see her much. Yep, I am - but not to the point where I'm distraught or thinking about ending things. Well, tough. Because she's frustrated too; 'cos she thinks I'm not "the one" (those dreaded words) and that she is only staying with me as she doesn't want to hurt me.

How did she do it?*

(*This time)

Via email. Always a lovely way to get dumped. Hence my response - "This conversation should have happened in person."

The next bit...

"Regardless, I agree that it's over."

This is the third time that she has dumped me. Even if she ever got in touch to get back with me (I doubt it this time, but stranger things have happened) then I'm going to turn her down. I think 3 times is a sign that things aren't meant to be!

She's clearly got commitment issues, or a very indecisive mind. I don't doubt she'll say the next thing to her next half dozen boyfriends, because I don't think she gets 'it' yet. In years to come, I'll unhide this entry - and when it is published, and if Tohko ever reads this, I hope she doesn't take offence to this sentence. I'm not trying to be nasty here. It's just the way I see it. (Perhaps I'll never unlock this, in fear that she'll take it the wrong way. Or perhaps one day I won't care either way?)

I'm not particularly sad. Well, I am - but more over the fact I know have to start over again with somebody else, more than the fact I lost her. Don't get me wrong - I love Tohko, and put everything I could into the relationship. But there's no point crying over spilt milk; when there's nothing more I could have done to prevent this inevitable ending.

Anyway - best of luck to her now.

Time to move on to the next chapter of my life!

(Firstly - some memories; because the relationship was tremendous fun, and I'm proud of 99% of it)


TOHKO IN MANCHESTER MEETING MY NEPHEW - I STAGED A MINI FAMILY PHOTO


AN IMPORTANT PHOTO (FOR ME) OF TWO PEOPLE I CARE DEEPLY ABOUT :)


TRYING TO BE COOL @ THE CINEMA, POST-WATCHING 'GRAVITY' (NOV 2013)



TOHKO PAINTING MY FACE FOR HALLOWEEN 2013... (REDRUM)


FIREWORKS ON HER BIRTHDAY! (BONFIRE NIGHT 2013)


 SILLY SWEET-EYE-ALIEN (HALLOWEEN 2013; IT STAYED THERE ALL NIGHT...)


SEXY TOHKO HIT GIRL @ MY DAD'S 50TH BIRTHDAY PARTY (28/09/2013) 

RIDING THROUGH THE MIST NEAR FERRY HILL (SEPT 2013)

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